I’ll Take The Aston


This Short Story of mine was shortlisted for the BBC’s ‘Opening Lines’ competition in 2015. It has since popped up on-line as an example of an editor’s critique. I have since re-worked it a little. And so here it is. Oh, and that’s me on the right in the photo – can you see the matching tie! Well, it was the 1970’s!

I’ll Take The Aston

Ronny wasn’t born this way, no sir. He considers those negative months as the most beatific forty weeks of all the sixteen years what’ve followed.

He’s sat on a sun-bleached sofa worn down to the bones, pallid and bug riddled. I prefer to stand, reckoning it’s safer. Someone’s patched the hole in the roof with army-marked tarp, the window’s slatted with bust up bed, the air’s thick with stench. Once upon a time this was somebody’s home. Once.

Shiner’s wearing out the floorboards, his arse must be giving him jip cause he keeps scratching at himself, just like that foamy-mouthed mutt did one time we went out hunting and wound up lost in the rain.

Continue reading “I’ll Take The Aston”



I entered this story for a competition at Tethered By Letters last year. And although it wasn’t a winner, it was deemed to have potential, and the editors there offered (without charge) to help me polish it to a standard so that it could (maybe) be published. I am so grateful to have benefitted from these guys. They suggested areas I could tighten up and improve the story, and of course a few grammatical things (after all I did fail my English ‘O’ Level many moons ago.)

Their programme is such a gift to new and emerging writers, and for sure they’ve  helped me improve. They recently made their kickstarter goal so this programme can thankfully continue, and they also publish ‘Friction,’ a wonderful literary journal – well, the first one certainly is.

So, here’s the result, three drafts from the first one sent. Three times better.